London’ Metropolitan Police force appear to have developed a new strategy for London’s famous Notting Hill Carnival, to replace their traditional ‘friendly copper dancing with a black lady’ approach. After finding a quantity of uncut heroin in Catford, South London, they tweeted that it had been seized specifically “in the run up to Notting Hill Carnival”, thus linking the West-Indian rooted street party with heroin in a way they never do with other similar large events.

The Notting Hill Carnival’s connection with heroin is well known and even the name ‘Notting’ comes from junkie slang for taking tabs of heroin. As anyone who has been to the Carnival knows, it’s a hotbed of heroin use, with party goers ‘chasing the dragon’ openly on the street and desperately selling all their belongings in exchange for more heroin joints. Lou Reed’s famous drug song ‘Heroin’ was written as a tribute to the Carnival after he’d spent a few hours in front of the Good Times Sound System in the early 90s.

Leftists and Corbynistas will say that it’s rum and Red Stripe rather than heroin that’s consumed at the Notting Hill Carnival. The politically correct sheeple will start bleating about how demonising one of the worlds best carnivals is at best, ill-advised and at worst institutionally racist. But the reality is that Notting Hill Carnival is Europe’s largest open air opium den.

The Met are expected to announce other crimes unrelated to the event which have been thwarted in the run up to the Notting Hill Carnival later today.